The ebb and flow.......

Big T on his first board, getting the first inclings of his backside attack. 1997

Stickman, lien ollie SB park 2000

Kev, sending the stale fish at a high altitude. Damn, that kid can ride! SB park 2000

Lizzy has been known to smoke the bowls here and there. Brookings, OR. 2003

Stick, backside floatness at the Reno skatepark on one of my first visits back after transplanting to SBtown. 1998

The Liz in the lap of luxury, PBR, cooler, camp stove, northcoast beach lurk. The guitar case says it all. Crescent City, Ca. 2003

Backside D in the Pac Northwest. 2003

My brother Kev posting an invert in SB, the biggest dude you'll ever see do the smoothest handstanders. 2000

Encinitas living room session, buzzing in the bee suit. 2005

Mr. North flowing in the Pala pool like only his twinkle toed, feather footed, style oozing ass could. 2003

Me on my first board. Some old ass yellowing pink nosed sixties Yater with a crazy D fin. I was still learning so I had a leash attached to the fin. I remember people used to kind of harsh me for riding that thing back then. Now days I'd be on the forefront of the surf hipster movement. 1000 steps 1997

Kev squeaking a backside tail while The Ringer looks on with approval. Goleta 1999

Scottie and his fresh new set up. This photo floods me with stoke. Check the socks tan! Solana Beach 2003

Little lip basher on a fun summer wind swell taken by my Paps. Cardiff 2005

Norte laying one back in the high desert mining country. Virginia City, NV. 2001

Kev lofting an indy air at one of the state fair demo/contests way back in the day. Reno 1996

Big T trunking it in north SB county on my dad's log. Refugio, Ca. 1996

Jon styling a backside four wheel slide in the beer cooler at WINCO foods. He does well around beer. Reno 2001

A few days ago at the ski place we grew up riding. Good times.

The kid's first day on the mountain in two seasons. Here forearms were super sore the next day from tensing them the first two runs anticipating a slam. HEHEHEHE....

Well here I am again, back in the blurring meltdown the day after treatment number 9 out of 12 which makes me 3/4 of the way through my chemo dream. Things are pretty much the same up in these parts, four or five days of fun and forgetfulness trying to surround myself with as much goodness and smile provoking folk and stoke before I'm back to the IV for another chemocation. The shit hits me a lot harder and quicker each time I get flushed. In the beginning I could be out and about for almost two days after my dose but now I'm already melting down before I leave the death lab. The last few treatments it takes all my power to hold back from gagging and puking all over my nurses and cancerous cohort. The smell of the saline they give me to dilute the tweak makes me a teetering vomitess mess. I can no longer make eye contact with any of the chemo drugs in the bag or while they are infiltrating my carcass. I Must hold back the nauseous puketitude at all costs, especially in the clinic. So.......FUCK! What can I say, the ride continues and I guess I'm steering toward the light at the end of the tunnel. The brilliant news is that two days ago at my oncology appointment I got back the results of my CT scan and my PET scan. These tests show swelling as well as cancerous areas which will glow on the image due to the radioactive dye they put into me before the test which is sugar based, sugar attracts to cancerous cells for some reason. Anyway, my funky ass is clean! No glowing, no massive tumorous inflammation and potentially no more CANCER? I have three more doses of mystery left and then I will have a month off before I go for my torching tenure of radiation which should last about another month. I'm twiddling my fingers here trying to figure out just what to do with myself on a month long sabbatical. I think I'm heading toward the sea, if you need me that's where I'll be. The weather has sure been nice around here the past week which has made the heinous days a lot better, feel like I've been stuck inside a snow globe for four months. Well I'm not feeling too wordy today, and what else can I say that I haven't said already. I think I've given enough prolific life advice and ideas to last me at least til the next posting. I wish I would post more but I think the more therapy they give me the crustier I get, kinda weird eh? Well there it is friends, I just went through a giant box of photos of mine that stirred up some great memories and happy happy feelings. Here's some pictures of me and my brothers and kids having some radical sideways standing times. I'm living vicariously through these photos! Thanks for listening and looking! Stick

I'm High.........

The road is long and I've been on it for quite awhile now, but i've got the directions to make the right turns and get to where I need to be. Exactly where the rest of you are, a place of well being.

Me and this thing these days are on a whole new trip, what I would do without it I can't begin. It's been there since I can remember and what it does for me now, well it saves me. Think I love skateboarding more than I ever did, funny cause it hurts more, I suck at it now, it's too cold here, and I'm pretty much my only friend when it comes to going to ride one. I step on it now and I transport to my own secret world of innocence, well being, and youthful satisfaction.

Well good day to you! It's SuperBalls Sunday and I just awoke from a thirteen hour substance induced sleepscapade. My dreams lately are so damn sick; comic book end of the world sagas, inflatable mat surfing mind benders, skateboard epics with iconic characters, snowsliding adventures with ollies from one mountain to the next. All of them having the oddly magical purpose of recharging my life and gifting my imagintation. It's a real gas living in this pseudo reality for the first couple days of these treatments, sometimes I have to remind myself about why it is I find myself on a bendy, half comatose magic carpet ride fueled by sweet little cookie monsters and those little white pills that come in the small ambiguous orange jar. Ahhhhhh..... yes, I must stay away from the dark side of the tweaky chemo zone. Typically I fancy a clear headed mind state in my (Real Life).... Notice how my pre-cancer existence is my (Real Life) and this melting swirl of soupy cognition I live and operate in now is something completely and ridiculously more complicated, though possibly more important. This thing here now, this state that I type from is a ground level view and a dismantled glimpse of how damn neat the things are that just go unseen and unappreciated in my daily human and earthly sense. In this life I see how cool it is that my mom fixed up, operated and glorified this little piece of property we live on. I see how important it is that my brother shed a tear after reading my last post. How crazy it really is that we can count on the planet to be on time all the time (mostly).How if you don't got great friends then you ain't gonna have great memories, and those are the only things that last in this life. I see how ironically wonderful it is to be back in touch with a whole hell of a lot of special people that I hold dearly in my life and how being squeezed into this situation allowed me the avenue to rekindle those relations. How magical and moving the sea is and what it does to my soul every time I think about it. It's not even about surfing anymore, it's about me asking her for forgiveness for all the things I didn't see or do on the days that I was on her shores. I was the weenus who only saw the Shred Zone and not the trees, kelp, sand, crabs, sun, sky, foam, my girlfriend, a magazine, a book, sometimes a sandwich......I see how this thing goes on and on and you can either take it in and fill it up or you can watch it pass by and dream it away. I think I may be having a little trouble self admittedly, on trying to get these pesky words and ill developed profoundings (not a word but it sounds good eh?) out of my weathered head today. I guess the main thing I want to re-iterate to myself and to those who may have given another moment of their life to read this is to slow down, look at the small things, examine the virtue, embrace the simplest moments, learn to be outspoken to the ones you love and most importantly always cherish what you have and where you've been, not what you want and where you're going. My theoretical renderings about being a better person and finding life's key points are on top of my agenda these days, simply because never before in my life have I thought seriously about losing them or losing you. Cheers, Stickman-

Broke the 200 Lb. mark at the doctor yesterday, the only kid to gain fifteen pounds on chemo while still sportin a full head of hair. POW!

Again, It was wonderful to hear all your letters of encouragement and embrace. Seth, Brian, Jelly, Shippy, Mateo, Nick, Devo, Sarah B., Malia, Jamers, Daniel, Erin, Amy, Jess, Andrea,Carina, Carmel, Nathan, Audrey, Remmers, Kim & Roger. It feels sooo great to have you guys with me! Man, I think I just squirt a couple tears..... THanks for stopping by. My email is onefintrim@gmail.com if you wanna......ya know......and stuff.